Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Worse than PMS

About every 6 months or so, I have this cycle of seething hate directed towards my job. It's back and it's worse than PMS. I can't stand a good majority of the people I work with, I hate dealing with the self-absorbed citizens that I have to talk to, and the office politics that dictate everything make me doubt the ability of good to win in the good vs. evil debate.

I watched The Day the Earth Stood Still the other night and now I have this thought stuck in my head that we really are truly the demise of our own race and planet. This is an ugly, ugly world we live in, full of unrecycled matter, dodging bullets, pandemics, and threats of nuclear warfare. I think that there has to be something better than this. Grass greaner and less angry somewhere.

I wish I could take this career decision back sometimes. Money doesn't mean much when you're disgusted 40 hours a week and you doubt the goodness of mankind. Really, ask Michael Jackson how happy all of his money made him. I used to really, really believe in the goodness of this job and then I realize that I was just a young kid that asked "how high?" when work said Jump!

I got this email from lil' Grandmama the other day that said you never lose as long as you don't lose hope. I've lost hope with my job. I guess that just makes me a big loser Sun-Wednesday 6pm-6am. I need a change, I really need a change. A big old midol for life.


  1. wow. i SO feel you on this.
    except my disgust happens on a daily basis. i went to my doctor and said, "Is it bad that I imagine stabbing people's eyeballs out during board meeting?" (it's not normal, just so you know.)
    i actually contemplate driving off the side of the road rather than go to work. you're right--no amount of money is worth it. i work about 60 hours a week, sometimes more... on salary for what? i am currently in the process of simplifying my life so i don't have to work as much... or at least come up with a plan to work for myself.
    not to mention, i internalize everything and make myself sick and get bleeding ulcers and ...
    hang in there, at least you are contributing to society.

    oh, and i love your grandma. so much.

  2. Carly - some day you and me are going to have a drink and MF all the hate out and then laugh hysterically about some random ass shit that has occured in our life. I have a blog coming up, oh you don't even know!!!